Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
We ask Allaah to heal your husband sooner
rather than later, and we ask Allaah to increase your reward for your
patience and forbearance. This calamity with which Allaah has tested you
will bring reward if you are patient and seek reward for it.
It was narrated that Suhayb said: The
Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“How wonderful is the situation of the believer, for all his affairs are
good. If something good happens to him, he gives thanks for it and that is
good for him; if something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience,
and that is good for him. This does not apply to anyone but the believer.”
Narrated by Muslim (2999).
And it was narrated from Abu Sa’eed
al-Khudri and Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: “No exhaustion, pain, anxiety, grief, harm or
distress befalls a Muslim, not even a thorn that pricks him, but Allaah will
expiate some of his sins thereby.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5318) and Muslim
(2573).
Secondly:
In the case of your husband’s sickness,
either he is aware of what he is doing and saying, or he is not aware. If he
is aware, then he is accountable for what he says and does, and it is not
permissible for him to accuse you or to fail to raise his children; he must
do what Allaah has enjoined upon him of acts of worship and obedience, and
not do that which Allaah has forbidden.
In this case you must carry out all marital
duties and it is not permissible for you to neglect them.
If he is not aware of what he is saying and
doing as the result of this sickness, then he is no longer accountable for
what he says and does. But if his actions affect the rights of others, then
the one whose right it is may take his right from your husband’s wealth or
from his guardians, such as if he transgresses against someone by killing
him or he damages his car and so on.
It was narrated from ‘Aa’ishah that the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The Pen has
been lifted from three: from the sleeping person until he wakes up, from the
minor until he grows up, and from the insane person until he comes to his
senses.” Narrated by Abu Dawood (4398), al-Nisaa’i (3432) and Ibn Maajah
(2041); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood.
Ibn Hazm (may Allaah have mercy on him)
said:
As for the one who has not yet reached
puberty, or who has reached puberty but has no discernment or reason, or has
lost his power of discernment after reaching puberty and being able to
discern, such people are not accountable and they are not allowed to dispose
of any of their wealth, because of the report that we have narrated from the
Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “The
Pen has been lifted from three”, in which he mentioned “from the minor until
he grows up, and from the insane person until he comes to his senses.”
Al-Muhalla
(7/200).
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy
on him) said:
As for the rational man, his opposite is the
insane man who has no reason, or the elderly man or elderly woman if they
have reached the age where they have lost the power of discernment, which is
known as senility. Such a person does not have to pray because he does not
have the mental capacity.
Majmoo’ al-Fataawa
(12/first question).
See scholarly comments on his behaviour and
its effects in the answer to question no.
73412.
With regard to his accusation that you have
sinned, if what you mean is an accusation of zina, then in the second case
he is not committing slander, because an important condition, namely reason,
is missing. Similarly, he cannot engage in li’aan either.
In al-Mawsoo’ah al-Fiqhiyyah (33/11)
it says:
The fuqaha’ are unanimously agreed that in
order for a person to be regarded as committing slander, he (or she) must be
an adult of sound mind and acting on the basis of free will, whether male or
female, free or slave, Muslim or non-Muslim.
End quote.
To sum up:
You may either put up with what he is doing,
if he does not understand what he is doing because of his sickness and loss
of reason, or you may refer your case to the qaadi to determine whether he
is fit to remain as your husband or the marriage may be annulled.
If he does understand what he is doing, then
you may either put up with what is happening or you may ask him for a
divorce, and if he refuses you may refer your case to the sharee’ah court to
arrange a separation.
And Allaah knows best.
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